


Worst Mission Ever

by KatieComma



Category: MacGyver (TV 2016)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-06-01
Packaged: 2019-05-16 18:08:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14816262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatieComma/pseuds/KatieComma
Summary: Bozer poses a question to Riley, Mac and Jack - what's the worst mission you've ever been on?Just some cute back and forth between the characters.





	Worst Mission Ever

“Worst mission ever?” Asked Mac, repeating Bozer’s question.

“Except Cairo!” Jack called out immediately as he came out onto the deck.

Mac pointed at Jack in agreement. “Not talking about Cairo,” he echoed.

“Worst with you all?” Jack asked. “Or worst ever?” He paused. “Nevermind. All the worst ones were with you guys. Well with Mac anyway.”

Mac frowned, then nodded, smiled and shook his head.

“That’s easy,” Riley said. “The time I was blackmailed to hack the NSA when my mom was kidnapped.”

Jack nodded solemnly, handing out the bottles of beer he’d brought from the kitchen and sat down next to Mac in front of the fire pit.

“Being disavowed wasn’t my favorite,” Bozer mulled it over. “What about that time I was stabbed at the lab? Does that count? It wasn’t really a mission.”

“It counts,” Jack and Mac said together.

“What about you guys?” Bozer asked.

Jack glanced at Mac.

“Ivory Coast?” Mac asked.

Jack shook his head. “That was like takin’ candy from a baby.” Jack thought for a minute: “Australian outback?”

“Which time?” Mac retorted.

“The third time, with the kangaroo,” Jack said.

“The kangaroo doesn’t actually narrow it down,” Mac narrowed his eyes at Jack.

“Oh! I got it!” Jack almost jumped up off the bench. “Surat, with the crane.”

“Oh yeah,” Mac replied with a laugh, equally as excited, “that was crazy.”

“Crane?” Riley asked.

“Like, the bird?” Bozer asked.

“No, tower crane in the middle of downtown,” Mac clarified. Then to Jack: “But I really don’t think that was the worst.”

“I know yours,” Jack smacked Mac’s shoulder playfully.

“Oh yeah?” Mac replied. “Lay it on me.”

“Nikki,” Jack said seriously.

Mac’s grin faded. He stared into the fire and shook his head. “Cairo and Nikki are off limits.”

“Fair enough man,” Jack said. The silence stretched between them all, the fire crackling before Jack spoke up again. “I got it: Venice.”

Mac smiled again. “Venice definitely tops my list, but you enjoyed Venice.”

“Come on now,” Jack scoffed, but his smile stayed in place. “Could I really enjoy any mission where my boy is tortured all day and almost dumped in the lagoon?”

“Apparently you can,” Mac replied.

“What happened in Venice?” Bozer asked.

Jack jumped on the request with excitement. “Alright, so there’s this hot mama I’m talkin’ up for info-”

Mac interrupted, rolling his eyes. “If by ‘hot mama’ you mean a daughter of the Sicilian mafia, whose father was trying to kill me.”

“Yeah, yeah, that’s what I meant,” Jack continued, “so this chicky and me we’re gettin’ acquainted, if you know what I mean?”

“We get it,” Riley cut in. “And: gross.”

“I’ll skip the details,” Jack winked at Bozer, “and I’m tryin’ to get her to give up Mac’s location-”

“All the while I’m being waterboarded in the basement,” Mac said. “And let me tell you being waterboarded with Venice lagoon water is pretty disgusting. I tasted it for a week.”

“Let me get this straight,” Bozer said. “You were seducing a sexy mobster’s daughter while Mac was bein’ tortured downstairs?”

“Yeah I was,” Jack grinned and leaned around the fire pit to give Bozer a high five.

“First of all,” Mac cut in, “can we stop focusing on Jack’s part in this story? Have you ever been waterboarded? I thought I was going to die. And they actually did throw me into the lagoon tied to a chair.”

“But you didn’t die. Ole Jacky saved the day,” Jack held out his beer to cheers Mac. Mac left him hanging.

“Second,” Mac continued, narrowing his eyes at Jack. “Jack wasn’t really seducing her. She was seducing him. She needed info too.”

“Hey now. That ain’t nice, calling into question my seduction skills-” Jack frowned.

“Can we stop talking about this now?” Riley asked. “We’re getting dangerously close to Jack providing detail to back up his ego.”

“What about you, Jack?” Bozer asked, attempting to move the conversation along.

“The Ghost in New York was pretty bad,” Mac suggested.

“Wasn’t the worst though,” Jack said, staring into the fire thoughtfully.

“What about that time you got stabbed in Canada?” Mac asked.

“Nope,” Jack shook his head.

“You guys have three stories about kangaroos in the Australian outback, but only one about Jack being stabbed in all of Canada?” Riley asked.

“It was a weird one too,” Jack said.

Mac started laughing. “He accidentally stabbed himself with this receiver antenna I made out of a…” At this point Mac dissolved into laughter and couldn’t finish the details of assembling the device, for which they were all grateful.

“Hilarious,” Jack said, mocking Mac’s laughter. “But no. I was gonna say Ireland but-”

“But Greta,” Mac added with a knowing smile.

“But Greta,” Jack repeated, staring through the fire into the past with fond remembrance.

“Oh my god,” Riley leaned toward them, her eyes reflecting the red-orange firelight. “Enough with the womanizing already.”

“Seriously,” Bozer replied, “when do I get in on this James Bond action?”

“You have a girlfriend,” Mac pointed out sternly.

“But in the line of duty, sometimes you gotta make a move or two right?” Bozer said hopefully.

Mac and Jack just shook their heads, laughed together, clinked their bottles and drank.

“I just don’t know,” Jack finally said. “Been too many to tell you which one was the worst.”

“I can tell you about Jack’s worst mission,” Matty’s voice came from behind them.

Everyone jumped and turned to look at her. She waited in the shadows, grinning and had obviously been listening for a while.

“You be nice now,” Jack warned.

“Oh wait, I can’t tell you, it’s classified,” she said, her face getting stern again as she walked to the fire pit and sat next to Bozer.

“We’ve worked together a long time Matty, and I know what you’re thinking, and that one ain’t even close,” Jack said. “Duke Jacoby was worse than that one.”

Matty’s mouth twitched into a smile.

“Well, we’ll have to continue this another time,” Matty said seriously. “We’ve got a crisis in Norway. Time for a quick briefing and then wheels up within the hour.”

The crew retreated into the kitchen, while Jack and Mac stayed behind to dowse the fire.

Mac grabbed Jack’s arm to get his attention. He checked over his shoulder to make sure no one was listening, before he met Jack’s eyes. “It was Tokyo and the Yakuza wasn’t it?” Mac asked.

Jack’s eyes misted up a little and his right eyebrow twitched that way it did when he was trying not to get emotional. He nodded. “Closest you ever came to dyin’ on my watch,” Jack confirmed quietly.

Mac smiled. “But I didn’t,” he said. “Ole Jacky saved the day.”

Jack nodded. “Yeah he did, didn’t he?” The intoxicating humor was already returning to his voice.

“If it comes up again we’ll just tell them it was Madagascar with the sailboat, just off the coast?” Mac suggested.

Jack laughed. “That was a nasty one for sure,” Jack agreed. “I barely remember it.”

“Well you did get a pretty heavy dose of morphine,” Mac said, “which was probably for the best.”

“Guys!” Matty called from inside. “What’s taking so long?”

Mac and Jack headed into the house.

“Coming!” Mac called.

“Let’s bounce!” Jack called out at the same time.


End file.
